Someone Answer the Door
I mostly want to be rich to do all sorts of awesome pranks/stunts I can’t do in my current financial situation. I’ve been talking about a lot of these for years but it’s good to get them down in writing in case I happen to find a jackpot winning power ball ticket just kind of laying around on the ground somewhere.
Back when I first moved to Des Plaines in 2007 I started ordering groceries from PeaPod.com. It’s really not that much more expensive and I really think I should start doing it again. The produce is really nice. I started going back to the store again mainly because I wasn’t sure how to tip the delivery guy. Every time he would arrive I would have extreme anxiety about what was the right amount to tip; was I even supposed to tip? I was paying for delivery after all…
Tip or not the delivery man would always walk into my apartment set down the groceries and that’s when the gears started turning. I’d go to the web site and substitute my regular order of food consumables for 40 boxes of Trojan Condoms, 4 cases of beer and another 2 cases of water (just to make him do multiple trips back and forth to the truck).
Since the delivery times are fairly tight I would also arrange for half naked girls to be sprawled around the apartment. Hopefully they’d look all strung out. Upon entering my sanctuary I’d instruct the delivery man to put my beer cases “over there with the other ones” which would just be a collection of the same beer with visible dust on the box because I obviously was not drinking any of it. Perhaps during this entire sequence of events I’d be dressed like a pirate or ninja, something bazaar. Answer the door as a Furry?
In a way I’d feel a little bad for the awkward situation I might be creating for this Peapod man. I do believe though that he wouldn’t realize it was a gag and just have a “crazy story” to share with his friends. It’s a win/win because I’d also have a possibly hilariously uncomfortable video from recording the whole thing.
Cl
Classic!