Subway: Redefining Meats Since 1965
What the hell Subway. Cold Cut Combo – That’s Bologna, Salami and Ham. But wait, what’s that you say? (All Meats Are Turkey Based). Okay assholes let’s go ahead and look up the definition of Ham: meat cut from the thigh of a hog. There’s a few others but they basically all the say the same thing. It’s a pig. It’s easy to be a little skeptical about what is in Bologna or Salami but there’s no way Ham can be Turkey.
Subway and I already have our problems so this is just one more thing. I don’t know how long the Cold Cut Combo has been tainted with gobblers but I sure won’t be eating it again. What I don’t understand is how come the Black Forest Ham is not made from Turkey? Are they using some awkward shit meat solely for the purpose of a Cold Cunt Combo? They must be. This sort of feels like the time I saw the paste they used to make chicken nuggets at McDonald’s. But worse…
Anyone that knows me would tell you I don’t care much about what goes on behind the scenes with my food. “As long as it tastes good” is what I say. And that still holds true but right now I feel a little bit cheated. When McDonald’s sells me an all beef patty, it might be every type of cow waste part under the sun, but at least it’s a cow. I’ve been deceived for how long? Here I am thinking I was eating a pig when it’s really some crappy bird that Fox Sports turns into a robot once a year. No Subway, you don’t get to do this to me. You don’t get to trick me into thinking I’m consuming something delicious by hiding small text under your meal.
Turkeys are also losers. I’m fed up with everything being made from them. They already took over our bacon and burgers, two sacred foods, and now they want to come and just rob Ham from us too? Will this trend carry out past Subway? “Excuse me Sir, does your store carry turkey ham? I don’t eat pork.”
So I have one more free idea for Subway. I swear I’m a genius but how about this:
Cold Cut Combo
Bologna, Salami & FUCKING TURKEY
not even your beef patty is all cow. burger patties contain bread-based filler and spices
This is actually good for me, being Seventh-Day Adventist, because I don’t eat pig. To clarify, do the cold cut combo meats have turkey AND pig, or just turkey?
@ Marie Adventist…
I just heard this too and since I don’t eat pork either I went online trying to verify. I found THIS site, but then I found another site which says:
Turkey Bologna: Mechanically separated turkey, water, contains less than 2% of: salt, corn syrup solids, potassium lactate, dextrose, sodium diacetate, sodium erythorbate, sodium nitrite, flavorings.
Turkey Ham: Cured turkey thigh meat, salt, contains less than 2% of: potassium lactate, brown sugar, sodium tripolyphosphate, dextrose, sodium diacetate, sodium erythorbate, smoke flavor, sodium nitrite, water.
Turkey Salami: Dark turkey, mechanically separated turkey, water, salt, contains less than 2% of: potassium lactate, sugar, sodium tripolyphosphate, dextrose, spice and flavorings, sodium diacetate, sodium erythorbate, smoke flavor, sodium nitrite.
Hmmmm I wonder if this is accurate! I’m certainly going to ask my local subway!!!
Actually, it has always said it on the menu. And if you taste the individual meats, they taste like ham, bologna, and salami, yet are healthier than the alternatives. So who cares? Did you think that the meats tasted bad? Don’t order it! Personally i’ll take the turkey based huge slab of meat for 5 dollars in a heartbeat. You are just looking for things to complain about but when it comes down to it, if it’s not hurting you and you like the taste, who cares what it is? This is some post-modernistic BS.
Fraud is fraud. The biology of a turkey does nor include a body part that is equivalent to ham. People understand ham to be from a pig, not a turkey. If it is from a turkey then call it something else. Notice that you can not get a turkey sub at Subway? If it so good for us then why is that the case? They also told me that they don’t serve coffee with their breakfast menu because their customers don’t ask for it. Really? People that don’t eat ham or drink real coffe are their “normal” customers. What is the definition of “normal” while we are at it?
Oh… I see because things taste similar they should be okay. Healthier reasons? Try cost saving.
A lot of vegetarian burgers taste like chicken. They should replace the chicken sandwiches at Wendy’s with them and still advertise them as a chicken sandwich. Why should people care? Tastes the same. If they do care they’re just a bunch of angry complainers.
I forgot to mention that “based” is the key determinant to a lie. If a premise is based in a lie then the conclusion is a lie as well. In this case, the base = 100% which means it is 100% authentic turkey + chemicals and not a basse at all. It is complete. Take “yes” and “no” for example. Or better yet, “excellent” which are complete. If we put a qualifier such as “very excellent” it actually takes away from the perfect word and becomes a diluting factor. Chicken-based turkey gravy is another example. Turkey stock is available. Even Thanksgiving is not sacred. In this pecking order the chicken trumps the turkey trumps the pig and it is endless. We demand real food. No-base food. Now I will be on the lookout for that word “base” and avoid anything attached to it since it is fake.
Notice that the above posts are all about words. It kills me that the food pyramid was replaced with a circle and not subscript-sized instead. If they had made the portion size the issue then the shape may as well have remained a triangle for all it matters. If calories on Subway Subs are such a marketing tool, then why are the $5 subs selling like crazy. People eat twice as much because the sandwiches are not filling. Hmmm….size matters 12″ or 6″ you decide.
OK, I am so with the “turkey-based ham” being not physically possible, because ham is pork. But those arguing it is “healthier” need to define healthy better. It has more fillers, hence more carbs. It usually has more fat added, and more fat total than real ham, hence more calories and fat grams. It is more processed with more trash than real meat. What exactly makes it healthier????